Contemporary society lays inordinate importance on money and popularity as the measure of success. In such a social ethos, we are often assailed by feelings of loss of worth and jealousy when compared to those who seem to have it all. However we can lead a far more wholesome existence if we only try and control our responses to the rich and famous among us.

Start by making a “pros and cons” list of all the things you are jealous of. For instance while an advantage of being popular is always having someone to hang out with, the obvious disadvantage lies in not knowing whether the friends like your company or your wealth.

Make another list of all the good things that have happened to you in your past, of all the good traits you possess as well as the family members and friends you cherish. An account of all these blessings in black and white and on paper might not seem such a bad deal after all.

If possible, get to know the person you feel jealous of. Once you see beneath the obvious glitter of wealth and popularity, you may realise that their lives are ultimately not so great.

However don’t hang about the rich and famous all the time. Look for friends and acquaintances from your own social set or with similar interests. You will find there is so much to explore and enjoy that there is not enough time to brood about what you don’t possess.

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No two people can think completely alike and thus agree on every issue of the daily life. However in a marriage if the two partners are forever sparring on every little matter, soon the relationship is bound to sour. It is therefore best to choose your battles and decide which issues are worth standing your ground.

Try not be bothered about the small stuff. Instead of getting mad about the way your spouse puts toilet paper on the roll, let go or think of other non-confrontational ways of conveying your dissatisfactions.

Most important of all consider which issues are worth fighting for. Before you start a fight, reflect on expectations to see if they are realistic and reasonable.

Resolve issues as they arise. If something about your spouse is bothering you now, be polite and clear it right away instead of letting it fester and then bringing it up it some day when it has snowballed blown into major issue.

A lot of issues can be ironed out by effective communication. Express your feelings objectively instead of keeping them bottled inside. This will not only let your partner know how you feel about something but also prevent you from exploding later over a minor oversight.